November 10, 2005

Night and Day

Intellectually, I knew my children would be unique, each different in
their own special ways; emotionally, it still gets me every time.

Today we took both girls to the doctor. (Whom I really like, by the
way; she's kind and gentle and knows her stuff. We actually thought
about switching insurance plans, but didn't so that we could stay with

Laura had to be *physically restrained* so the doctor could do a VERY
quick exam: ears, heart, throat and teeth (that last was a bonus; since
she was screaming anyway, the doc didn't have to mess with any "Open
wide and say 'aaah'" stuff. Always a silver lining...)

Afterwards, I asked Laura if she was scared.
"Even though you knew you wouldn't get any shots today?"
"Do you like the doctor?"
"Has she ever hurt you?"
"So, why were you so scared?"


Emily burbled through her exam, flirting shamelessly with the doctor.
She also got three shots, and although she fussed a little when the
plunger was actually going down for each of them, she never worked up
to an actual cry. Oh, how different from big sister, who left the
nurses shaking a little at the same age (Actual quote : "Wow, she's
really a strong one!).

I know they're both our children; I was there. They even look related.
But some days, it's hard to believe it.

For those who want the box scores, Laura weighs 28 pounds, putting her
in the 66th percentile on the charts of averages; height of 33.5
inches, the 37th percentile. She has slimmed down a lot, but is still
"husky". Emily has more than doubled her birth weight, at 16 pounds
even, which is the 85 percentile, and has stretched out to 25 inches,
the 65th percentile. To make it easier to compare, Emily's about to
sprout some more (I can tell by how much she's been eating), she's
still two weeks shy of an actual four months, and yet she already has
the height Laura did at that point...and weighs two pounds less. Ah,
the miracle of genetics!


Ty Davison said...

I try to stay away from the "why" questions with Jonah since, whether what he's done is good or bad, he can't formulate a coherent thought around the idea, let alone a reasonable response. Indeed, if you ever want to see the deer in the headlights look, ask Jonah "why?" after he's done something he shouldn't.

According to what I've read*, and I tend to believe it, the best I can do is to try to validate and explain whatever feelings Jonah is having at the time. That might not get him through events like doctor visits any better, but in theory it will teach him that it's OK to have whatever emotion it is he's feeling.

* Faber and Mazlish's How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk. The techniques discussed therein also, in my experience, work with adults. =)

Ginger Ogle said...

Thanks for the reference; I'll look into it, though it sounds a lot like what our favorites, the amazing doc and nurse Sears, say. :-)